Ok, so this whole blog thing hasn't quite caught on the way I had hoped. This is due mainly to my laziness in keeping up with it and partly because of the lack of imagination to come up with cool new posts. I need to get out there somehow. Show the world who I am, show them what I got... that kinda thing.
34
My birthday is right around the corner. I'm into my mid-thirties now, mid thirties!!! I keep trying to figure out whatever happened to my twenties. I just feel like I'm hurtling towards the retirement home at this point and if I'm ever going to have something to show for myself, I better get going ASAP!
It's been a hectic few months... holidays, wedding planning, therapy, etc.. I'm in a new year and feel better than I have in quite a while. I think we've found a happy medium with the meds, I'm going back to the gym, I'm keeping all kinds of notes and journals. I have plans. I just hope I can keep up the momentum now. Let's be honest... I'm not one to keep up momentum well. I get bored easily and frustrated even more easily. I have decided though, that this time will be different. Don't ask me why or how... haven't gotten that far yet. I just know it will be. I'm going to make it be. I think I have a talent of some kind and just need a more well defined niche. I've got to push myself more than I ever have and that's not saying much. I do have my T though and with his help, I think I might actually be able to maintain this lifestyle more.
Deep Breaths.
I'm going to focus on the one thing I do love and do possess talent in... photography. After all the wedding hoopla has died down, I think I might try to take a class and I think I might try to make my own website and even perhaps get a gig of some kind. I can't give up. Not again. I won't let my life keep slipping through my fingers. I see it out there everyday and I keep thinking, why not me? When is it going to be my turn? I could do that! Well, now's my chance.
First step... blog more
This will become a new platform on which to once again start my life. I'm going to try to include more photography, put myself out there more. I have to tell myself it's ok to be selfish once in a while. I just don't want to lie on my deathbed one day and wonder what if about everything. I'm not getting any younger, and yes, I know I'm still so young. I can do this. It might hurt a little, or a lot, but I can do this.
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"I'm into my mid-thirties now, mid thirties!!!"
ReplyDeleteI'm not quite there yet, but had a similar revelation when filling out a hotel satisfaction survey this morning. The age bracket broke at 34. I have a year and half left until I'm in the next one, and not happy to see that on paper.
Kudos on kick-starting the blog again. I've heard that having a theme helps keep blog postings more consistent, but I don't read enough to confirm that. Makes sense though, so perhaps photography can be a theme for you. Definitely take a class or two. Whatever you do, good luck!